Thursday, January 20, 2011

Can you dance in the rain?

Not literally--although that would take you back to childhood wouldn't it? That carefree feeling of dancing in the rain on a warm summer day - pure childhood joy.

But, the rain I am talking about isn't that type of rain. It's the hard times that we face in our lives. How do you deal with them? Do you ever ask for them?

A while ago, I had a conversation with a friend about my losses and how I was dealing with lots of people around me having babies. I have to say that this friend has been one that has NOT said things that have made me wince. Instead, she was the one that said in no uncertain terms when we were going through our first miscarriage that it sucked (sorry about the language people). But, she was right, it did!

She didn't try to sugar coat it or say things like: your still young, you have plenty of time, there is a reason for it all, etc. Really, at that moment I didn't want to hear those things. Sure there is a reason, but I just wanted to cry, to be upset, to well...wallow for a bit. I wanted to be allowed to do this and be told I had the right. She did that for me. In a way that she will never fully understand, I held on to those words and the fact that someone realized that it wasn't easy and it helped.

Though, I don't talk to this friend daily or even weekly for that matter, when I do and when she checks in on this topic, I am able to be more open about my feelings. That is a gift that she has given to me. The gift of an ear that is willingly to listen and not judge. An ear that will allow tears and pain to come out if they need to. What a gift it is to have a friend like that. I am blessed to have a number of women in my life that are like that and to have an amazing supportive husband who gives me that ear anytime I need it.

Anyway, back to the rain and this friend. I was telling her that I was handling it. I told her that I needed to praise HIM nomatter what. Are the losses what I would choose? Certainly not, but I learned a long time ago, that HE knows best and HIS plans are better than what I could come up with myself.

Of course, she was one of the few asking how I was doing with it all. I think others would rather forget. I help them forget because I like to put on my stern upper lip and move forward. But, there are certain times of the year (when I would have given birth, when I lost the babies) that it's harder to get that stern upperlip. But, we manage, right?

That said, I've grown through all of this--the infertility and the multiple losses. I look at life different. I've grown in ways I may never have grown otherwise. HE has shown me that I am stronger than I thought and that with HIM I can get through anything.

I think these two songs are very fitting for the topic, not to mention they are 2 of my favorites.
 Bring the Rain 
The story behind this song: Bring the Rain--the story behind the song.
Praise You In This Storm

Guest Blogger returns tomorrow. Can't wait to see what he comes up with this week! I will also be posting some questions as to what you want me to cover with photography. So, be sure to check in and be sure to leave a comment so I know where to focus.

Have a wonderful day everyone!

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